Saturday, August 9, 2014

Hello again! After not writing for a while maybe it's time to start writing again. Hopefully I can find some time to do this more often again. As we all know life gets crazy and you begin to feel like everything's a chore. I am passionate about my profession though and love to be able to share information that hopefully can help some.

Today's topic will be on couples.

It is just a brief note that comes up a lot when working with couples. It is the idea of being able to hold you partner's anger. So many times people cannot just be ok with someone being mad at them. And this isn't true for just a couple, but really for any relationship at all. If you can start to just allow someone to be mad at you, see what changes can occur. What I see happen is that we want to get defensive or tell them they shouldn't be mad or even that we just can't accept that we hurt someone, and maybe we didn't even mean to hurt them but it did and we just can't hear that we hurt them and now they are mad at us. Just try this, the next time someone is mad at you let it be ok. Let them be mad at you. It is ok. Say to them I see you are mad at me. Say to yourself it's ok that they are mad at me. Really just start with that and begin to see the changes that follow. There is more that you can do after this, but I just want to start with you feeling the difference in yourself when it can be ok for someone to be mad at you. (When I say mad, I also mean hurt as usually what is under the anger is hurt.)